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December 24, 2005

Girth McDürchstein’s ‘The Return’

Written by Girth McDürchstein on December 24, 2005 8:58 AM
Permalink |  Band News Recording Girth McDürchstein's 'The Return'  | Digg It

Hey, motherfuckers. Many of our most hardcore fans, none of whom seem to be aware of our new website or MySpace (yet!), are aware that I am currently in the early throes of the creative process in working on my new, 16-song cycle, The Return.

The Return tells the completely fictional story of a rocker who never found the success that he always wanted, so when he learns his high school sweetheart—and former bandmate—is marrying, he returns to his hometown of Cedar Rapids to win her back. He believes his lack of success as a musician is karmic payback for his abandoning her at the altar, so if he has her back, he will find both love and musical inspiration. Of course, nothing seems to go right for him, particularly when the second woman he has left at the altar strolls into town to make his life a living hell.

So far I’ve composed the first song, “The Return,” an exploration of the bittersweet feelings one has when returning to a place that is no longer home, and “Song for Kelly,” which details the tumultuous sexual feelings of someone who has been on the road, alone, for 10 days. Unfortunately, though I have outlined the general thematic and narrative structure of the remaining 14 songs, I find myself unable to capture the emotional core either musically or lyrically. Here are songs of sorrow, jealousy, anger, happiness, regret, and infidelity—am I really not up to the challenge of exploring such weighty feelings?

In the past, many of my songs have had somewhat of a sexual core, but under the surface loomed deeper material. With The Hedge, I broke away from that mold (for the most part—”College Girls” is at times ribald), and I promised myself I would never go back to that. I’m 33 years old, and I’m married, so why am I still thinking about sex? Why does it gently caress the slippery lyrical hole I’ve dug myself? Why can’t I just push it away and whisper, “Not tonight”?

I want to be strong enough to resist, but I fear I may have no choice but to give in, once again, to the yearning dry-thrusts of creativity, to unlace the red leather pants of my poetry.

I just hope you, the fans, aren’t disappointed by my regression and submission.

—Girth